I'd really appreciate some solid critique of my Rising Stars of Manga piece.

I'm looking to get started with the production of a new comic soon, so I thought it would be worthwhile to take a final look at my Rising Stars of Manga piece to figure out what I need to learn moving forward. Whilst there is plenty that I'm happy about with this story, I don't want to rest on my laurels and overlook the flaws in this piece. It's important to recognise flaws and weaknesses so that I can overcome them with my comics in the future.

See the comic pages here:
http://www.sweatdrop.com/dock/twoforjoy/

Some criticism that I've already received:
Page 11 - top right panel, punch is rendered poorly

Page 09 - bottom panel, kneeing in face is poor.
Random: "very dodgy anatomy during the fight scene"

It's clear that most of the criticism so far has focused on the fight scene, which has been helpful for me to consider for future projects so that I can either taking more time, care or choosing to omit combat such as this altogether.

Were there any aspects of the art that you found to be weak or jarring? I'm also interested to know whether the story made sense to you. Was the abstraction straight-forward, and did the dialogue 'work' in general? Were there any parts of it you felt were strong, or especially liked?

Any input is useful for me, and I promise I won't be upset. I'm focusing on my next comic now, so any feedback should help me to make my next project even better, especially as I'm not bound to deadlines or page count.

This isn't any sort of fishing for compliments, I just want useful feedback so that I can improve my comics in the future.